Shasta Hussein, Commander of the Martians

Joseph Shahda, amateur sleuth, has identified another open source Iraq document that alludes to the real mastermind who attacked the United States on 11 September.

"Coded Letter" to Saddam written in English Dated September 2001.

Document CMPC-2003-004963 is a "coded" handwritten letter in English from a person called Amelia Rovena Guadagno to Saddam Hussein dated September 2001. The writer of the coded letter is asking Saddam to "Nuclear the United States as required and as soon as possible as this is September 2001". In fact the document later on indicates that this letter was written on or before September 8 2001. I have no idea what this letter means, whether it is a hoax, whether it is true, but someone may find something about it that it is not clear to the naked eye.

We are given to understand that there is probably something in this "coded letter" not entirely clear to the average reader. But what exactly is it?

Click here for the original letter and here for a discernible reproduction.

As ever, Shahda nudges his readers in the wrong direction: Coded Iraqi action plan > bomb blast > United States > September 2001.

When one examines the document (ahem, I mean coded letter, wink-wink, nudge-nudge), it's hard not to laugh. Take just these few omitted snippets for example:

The weather was wrong again today also in Newburgh, New York. I wore the brown dress anyway!

And the moon's a balloon is not greer or geer as I proved.

And as of the Commander of the Martians I'm the only one remaining.

And just because Arnold S. did a Total Recall based on this article does not mean Naziism of Adolf is the right thing. And just because Sylvester S. did Rocky does not mean the Gottfrieds are Sly's Salvation of Judge Dredd.

Current affairs just aren't what they used to be. The USA can't even do love affairs without messing up. No pun.

They finally found the real God and what did they do? They consulted Debra. Now, understand, there are two Debra's. One is now a blonde still trying to understand who is Commander Shasta, and the other is really Cupid who went on strike even for possibly Macintosh.

Can you crack the martian code?